Obiagu Makes

Hey, beautiful people!

It’s March, a month to honor women all over the world. For me, this means a time of mixed feelings. March 8 is International Women’s Day. It’s also my mom’s birthday. She would have been 56 years old.

It has been fourteen years since my mother passed at the age of 42. And every time I’m reminded of this, I say silently, “She was too young”. Even this year, she turned 56, and she is still too young. There is no doubt that I am still hurting from her loss and I am sure that she left too early. She had more living to do! It was simply too soon.
My mother was someone who you couldn’t describe with just one word. She was a woman who fought many demons on her own. She was beautiful, comedic, caring, street-smart, wise, affectionate, authentic, & determined. She had a lot of childhood and adulthood trauma, and I am thankful that she shared her troubles with me. Without knowing about her trauma, I wouldn’t have known about who she was, why she reacted this way, or why she parented us in that way. So, learning about all that she was faced with in her life, I can genuinely say that she did try her best when raising two kids.

Every year, I try to find some way to honor her. For years, I would do something for her death anniversary in May. But over the past two years, I decided to focus on her LIFE, not the saddest moment of my life. When focusing on her death date, those memories come at me full force. She deserved to live in peace and I could not get that thought out of my head. So, instead, I just wanted to honor her on her birthday. Many ideas were racing through my head, but some were concrete. One was that I use the color purple. And two, I would do multiple ideas throughout the month instead of just on the 8th. I have a crochet make in mind, but this month has been busier than expected and well….ya girl aint started on it yet!

This make was simple but well-loved. I love a maxi skirt with matching headwrap. This combo just evokes power, blackness, beauty, and elegance. I have made aplenty of maxi skirts over the years, and every time I make one, I am reminded of my mother. It seems as though every time I make a maxi, she’s smiling down at me in awe. If she were alive, she would tell me how beautiful I am and ask me to make her one.

This fabric is from my friends over at Minerva! I was intentional in picking this fabric. I knew I wanted to make something for my mom in this color. However it took until the day before to be reminded of the good ole faithful, maxi skirt and headwrap. I’ve been at this thang called sewing for some years. I don’t even want to figure out how many patterns I have tested or how many patterns I have on my computer drive. I often have to skim in groups or on pattern websites to get a refresher on patterns I once loved. On Made for Mermaid’s webpage, I skimmed back on patterns and went, “OH! the Joy skirt!” When Black Panther 2 came out, I made the Joy dress, but took the skirt only and added a waistband. I wanted to revisit this style again! This fabric is Cotton lycra in such a beautiful shade of lavender. I had four yards to work with as initially, I wanted to make some kind of dress. The stretch and weight made those pleats stand out and I love it! I also love and appreciate how fast the processing time is. Minerva is UK-based and I love that I can place an order and receive a shipping notification so soon!

On her birthday, I made a delicious three-layer cake. I made fudge swirl cake with a homemade cream cheese whipped frosting that was so damn good I felt like I was floating. As a child, my mother made sure to make my birthday memorable. We were a low-income family, but my mom always found a way to make my day special. My birthday is December 20th. My mother knew that other people would be more inclined to combine my birthday and Christmas gifts, so she was great at separating the two for me. One of the exciting things about my birthday was the cake! She would ask me what I wanted and order it from Walmart. I always asked for a fudge swirl sheet cake with whipped icing. She also loved whipped icing, so it was an easy yes! This cake embodied the happy moments of my childhood, along with my mother’s cravings and interests. The whole family gobbled this up! And I’d be lying if I said I didn’t run it back the next day and devour two slices. My belly and heart were full and content!

I was so excited to work on this make for my mom. It gave me the look I was going for, and it was soothing and healing to honor her with a craft that has fed my soul over the years. My mother always used to say she was living through me. I wish it didn’t have to be so literal, but I know that she’s enjoying her views. I love you, mother. Thank you for the life you gave me and the wisdom you passed down.

Patterns used to complete the look is the Joy skirt paired with Hibiscus. The Joy is from Made for Mermaids. The Hibiscus is from Petite Stitchery & Co.

Peace & Blessings!

-Kamali